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I Have Absolutely No Idea What I’m Doing… and That’s Okay!

This is a post that’s sorta been flitting around in my mind for a while but I’ve literally had no idea what to say or how to approach it so I’ve put off writing anything. But… I’m coming up to my 23rd birthday and I feel now is more relevant that ever to declare the fact that, I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing. And that’s okay.

I recently found this photo…

11873410_951235518232814_4957715135230268060_nOn Facebook and after a particularly frustrating day, reading that felt like a whole weight had been lifted off my shoulders. It’s only a little thing. A simple thing. But something about it made me feel 10 times better. Especially finding out that my absolute hero *Walt Disney* didn’t have it altogether when he was my age, yet look what he achieved.

I don’t really know where this post is going, which I feel is quite relevant, considering the topic, but I just wanted to vent a little bit about the fact that I’m approaching 23 and have no idea what the fuck I’m doing or where the fuck I want to be. Sorry for being awfully sweary but today calls for swearyness.

I’ve never had a set plan; I was always one of these people who wanted to do something new every week and has tried everything under the sun from playing the piano, drama, being a teaching assistant or a fitness instructor. Wanting to join the police force, wanting to be a drummer in a band or a hairdresser. Like, seriously, it’s pretty ridiculous.

I never went to University and although thinking back now, I wish I had, there’s still not a subject I would have liked to do and think I would have benefitted from. But now I’m almost 23 with no University degree, a ton of experience, a bucket full of dreams but absolutely no idea where to go with them. And it’s pretty scary.

But then I remember how young 23 actually is. Someone on Twitter said it was, ‘a pretty clueless age’ which actually made me feel better and have a little chuckle. I can understand that; early 20’s can be confusing as hell and although there’s the lucky ones who already have it all worked out, the majority of us don’t and that fact in itself makes me feel more united that anything has in a long time.

So remember, everything is a working progress. You are a working progress. You’ll never be finished because we’re always adapting and changing and that’s life. I had no idea what I’m doing at 22. I will have no idea what I’m doing at 23 and I probably won’t have any idea what I’m doing at 30, 40 or 50 either.

But as long as you’re happy, kind and caring and never stop dreaming; you’ll be okay. I plan to spend my 23rd year discovering new things, finding myself and most of all, winging it. I’m going with the flow and whatever happens, happens.

So… As my idol himself once said, ‘If you can dream it, you can do it’. And if bankruptcy at 23 is good enough for Walt Disney, it’s good enough for me.


Jenny in Neverland

Twenty-something lifestyle blogger from Essex. Book lover, Slytherin, organisational wizard and enjoys Motorsport, Disney and Yoga.


  1. eric says:

    27 years old and ZERO idea what I’m doing with my life… in a twisted way I feel better seeing other people with similar struggles. It’s not really twisted at all I suppose, it’s actually more like hope and knowing that you’re not alone. I took my paramedic course 5 years ago, my fire fighting 3 months ago and now since it’s been so long ago since i took my paramedic it’s looking like i’m going to have to redo it all over…… wtf is wrong with me. I’m sure doing things as$ backwards. And now i’m not even sure if i want to be a fire fighter. I volunteered for 4 years back home in a community right beside my home town and saw enough death of people I know to really mess me up and re consider it all… I sometimes hope I wasn’t just doing the job for the prestige that comes with the title..”Firefighter”…. it’s actually a sad job sometimes. Sorry for my grammar … it’s late and i’m tired and i just don tcare right now. lol.

    Anways I really enjoyed your post…you’ll figure it out. I know you will.
    May God bless you on your path.

    – E

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  4. I feel you! I do have an university degree (finished this year), and I’m a little younger than you, but god right now I’m scared outta my mind. I do have a plan on where I want to go with my life, but there’s no guarantee that I’ll actually be able to fulfill my goals. I think pretty much everybody when they get in their 20s start feeling a bit lost. It’s so hard to decide what to do with your life, especially because you can’t be sure that you’re actually making the right choice. You have lots of experience, that’s a huge advantage. I’ll say if you can afford it try to get a degree, you won’t necessarily land a job, but I’m sure it can open doors for you. If you’re can’t settle on something, make a list of what you like and dislike and why, where you want to see yourself in let’s say 10 years and what kind of job can you imagine yourself doing. Maybe it’ll help you decide what to do. Anyway, it was a great post!

    1. Don’t panic! Congrats on graduating this year, that’s fab! 20’s are a really tough age. I can’t remember ever feeling like this when I was 17, 18 or 19. I think the structure of school or sixth form kinda took away all this for the time being as we had other things to concentrate on, like studying. I’d love to do a course with the Open University. Again, don’t know what though. It will take a lot of planning and consideration I think because going to an actual university wouldn’t be an option for me now due to other reasons. But… I have faith it will work out and what’s meant to be, will be (: xx

  5. This post resonates so much with me. And I LOVE that graphic too; I think I saw it on twitter the other day. We always think we have to have it all together, but we really don’t. I used to think whatever I choose to study is something that I’ll have to stick with for the rest of my life and I panicked about choosing a direction or a job because there was nothing I could imagine doing for twenty years at a time. And I still don’t, but THAT’S OKAY. Even if I have to remind myself at least twice a day. Absolutely no one forces you to stick with something if you don’t like it (even though bills make it hard to always do whatever you want). You can still switch careers when you’re forty. It’s going to take time and effort, but it’s doable. I’m also someone who always has to try something new, and I get incredibly bored when I feel like I’m not learning anything new anymore, so I completely understand that part of your post. I always look at people doing the various part time jobs I’ve had and think HOW have you been doing this for 5, 10 or 20 years? I KNOW that everyone is different, but I don’t think I could do it. I haven’t figured out what career path would let me switch it up every once in a while, but meanwhile I’ll just try to do the things i’m passionate about and deal with things as they come. And, most importantly, not panic.

    1. I think the last thing, ‘most importantly, not panic’ is THE most important thing everyone has to remember when we think or worry about something like this. Because panicking will not help. I completely understand what you’re saying – I still have no idea what I want to do and like you, I get bored quite quickly too. I always need to be doing or planning something new and exciting. I’ve started so many online projects in the past which I was so excited and enthusiastic about but most of them dwindled out. Anyone who claims to have every aspect of their life together is probably telling porkies hehe (: xx

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  7. Sandra says:

    I love this post, it’s so accurate on so many levels and i don’t think it matters what age you are, it still helps to read something like this. When i was 28 i was married, owned my own home, had my own business and thought i was happy (i wasn’t). I’m now 37 and divorced, renting my house (sold the other one), business winding down but i have gained a psychology degree and am definitely happy now. I’m working towards what i want to do and exploring other options along the way but i only realised where i wanted to be about a year ago and it’ll take another 3 years to get there. What i’m trying to say is things can change so much in a short space of time and while it may take a while to get wherever you decide you want to be i believe the journey is equally as important as the destination.

    1. Wow this is a really interesting comment to hear what you’ve been through and how you’ve adapted. I totally agree with your last sentence too – there is no destination really, as we’re always changing, so you’ve gotta make the most of every journey (: xx

  8. I hope anyone reading this post who’s a bit lost will read your comment because it’s so inspiring and a true example of how things WILL change but it’s not always a bad thing. 3 countries?! Wow! Thank you so much for sharing (: xx

  9. Erika says:

    Oh this post makes me feel much better. I actually do have a degree, but I don’t know what to do with it! I do have a job but I don’t see myself doing it for a long time. I wish I was one of those people who have their life set and knew what they want to do. But I’m glad to know that I’m not the only who feels this way! ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. I’m so glad the post has made you feel better; I’m shocked at how many people feel the same, you’re DEFINITELY not alone on that one! (: Congrats on your degree, you’ll figure it all out! xx

  10. I hadn’t actually seen this picture, but it (and this post!) has made me feel so much better. I will be 23 too next year, and I always worry that time is passing and I still haven’t figured out what I want to do with my life, but this has reminded me how young I still am, and how there is still so much time. Great post!

    1. I only came across it randomly on Facebook but I was like ‘Wow… That’s being saved’. I might even put it as my laptop background haha ;D But you’re not the only one! 23 is so young so don’t worry! Just have fun (: xx

  11. Thanks for writing this post, even though I am fast approaching the ripe old age of 15 and it seems like I have plenty of time to figure out what I want to do. Pressure to go into medicine and conventional jobs are surrounding me and it’s just too much, especially when my peers know what they want to do when they grow up but I just wanted to say thank you because I have had this in my mind since my summer holidays started.

    1. Wow, what I’d give to be 15 again! Please, please, please don’t worry. You’re far too young to be stressing about that now. It’s good that you’ve got dreams and ambitions at such a young age (I didn’t when I was 15!) but it’s so important to just have fun and enjoy yourself and work hard in school and trust that everything will work out, because it will. You’ve got all the time in the world! (: xx

      1. I know that now ๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜„

  12. I didn’t even begin to figure out my life’s path until I was in my late 30s. If there was one thing I could go back and tell 20-something me it would be to relax…because it will all work out as it is intended to. ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. I love this comment! I’ll definitely remember this when I next end up stressing! (: xx

  13. Danielle Eskdale says:

    So…although I’m 25 (just a little older than 23 haha) very soon and it often gets me down when people in their teens are majorly successful and money is sometimes tight, but I love seeing images like this. I never went to Uni and don’t regret it – I’d of hated it and am much more of a housewife than a business woman anyways. It gives me hope though, knowing that my idols didn’t succeed until they were older, that I still have time to make my dreams happen.


    1. I swear more teens now have it all worked out than our generation do? I think social media has a lot to do with that tbh. I don’t think I REGRET not going to Uni, I just think it would have been a good experience – but like I said, there’s nothing I wanted to do! I ain’t getting into that much debt for nothing haha. I think I’m a bit like that as well, housewifey rather than business womaney and that’s okay! xx

  14. I think that’s something people don’t make obvious enough: I’m not sure anyone knows what they’re doing! We might have some idea of what we would enjoy as a career (funnily enough, I decided that just when I turned 23) or what makes us happy, but there’s this notion that we need to have certain things checked off a list and our future planned out. (The future doesn’t exist!)

    I’m not going to deny it’s lovely to work towards something, because most of the time I need that. However, now I have a job I’m happy with, I’m very happy to toddle along for the moment. I’m not thinking five, ten years ahead (or even five months). The future can stay in the future for now.

    The only advice I can think to give is to try lots of things, do what makes you happy (if only for now), and trust that what’s for you won’t pass you!

    1. I completely agree! Our interests and tastes will change as we grow so doing something you absolutely love NOW doesn’t necessarily you’ll love it in 2 or 3 years time so I think it’s important to just work hard and make the most of it before things change. Trying lots of things and learning what you love is so important! (: xx

  15. Melissa says:

    Don’t worry, I’m 25 and have no idea either about my life’s plan either. I’m sort of making it up as I go along, like some sort of high stakes adventure.

  16. I just want you to know that this post meant so much to me. I have to speak to my boss today about something that could potentially affect the company. It has taken a huge toll on me, I am losing sleep stressing and worrying about it. I feel I have to do this for ME but I still feel this immense pressure to keep the company’s interest at heart. I am trying to soak up all the courage I need to do what is right for me and talk to my boss about this… So thank you, this has given me the much needed courage.

    Nihaad – the little blog of STUFF

    1. Ohhhh comments like this really make my day – I’m so glad you found courage in this post and thank you for sharing your lovely comment. Whatever it is, I do hope everything goes okay for you and your job but if it doesn’t, remember it’s not the end of the world and as long as your intentions are true then it’ll be okay (: xx

  17. Well I’m turning 23 too next month, and I happen to have a bachelors degree in computer science and zero experience. But I still have no clue what I’m doing and where I’m going. It worries me so much that my hands are literally shaking while I type this. Although I feel better after reading your post. ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. Ah we seem to be in very opposite situations here but neither of them are necessarily better! (That would make for an interesting discussion post, I think!) Please don’t worry, you’re not alone and things will work out. Congrats on your degree! (: xx

      1. Thanks Jenny but where I live almost every second person has a degree and people do not value it much! But hopefully things will work out. And you are doing a great job here! ๐Ÿ™‚

  18. BrizzleLass says:

    I don’t think anyone ever has it together, there are people who say they have, but I’ll they are lying and there are parts of their lives completely out of control! I’m now approaching my 36th birthday and my life has turned on it’s head so many times I continuously change paths and wonder what is next!

    1. I think you might be right there, Claire. I mean, I’m sure everyone has at least one area of their lives “sorted out”. E.g A relationship, a family, a good job but chances are there will be another aspect that isn’t. I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing! It keeps things new and exciting but I hope you’re happy with wherever you are right now (: xx

  19. Another fab post! So true. I’ll be 25 in a few months and still have NO CLUE what I’m doing with most my life. And I so want to try ALL OF THE THINGS too. AND in the same boat about uni – never went, kinda regret it, but actually nothing meant enough/would have impacted enough to make it worth it! But you’re right, we are so young still (okay, you a bit more than me lol) and it’s totally okay. Seriously, you and I need to have a loooong chat over a few bottles of wine one night haha xxxx

    1. Wow, we’re in so similar situations! I think that would be a BRILLIANT idea! Where abouts in the UK are you?! We will arrange this AT ONCE and then get drunk and cry about how we dunno what we’re doing ;D xxxx

      1. Haha sounds perfect! I’m in Jersey, which is why it’s always hard to meet people ๐Ÿ™ but we must arrange something!!! I come over to the UK every few months or so. We must make it happen, where abouts are you? Xxxx

  20. I have a very similar post to this sitting in my drafts; only I’m 40 not 23! I went to uni part time as a mature student at 33 so there’s hope for everyone if that’s the path they wish to follow. However, it doesn’t guarantee a successful job or a happy life. Go with the flow, you’re a clever young woman, you’ll figure it out xx

    1. Oh really?! I’d love to read it! Let me know when/if you decide to post it (: Oh really? That’s interesting, what did you study? I’d love to hear more about that too! xx

      1. It’s one of those posts that might never see the light of day!
        I studied law part time for 4 years, hard work but I enjoyed it but am still yet to change my job.

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