Something I’ve always been able to pride myself on is that I’m good at giving advice to people. I’m good with words and articulating the correct thing to say to someone in a certain situation. I’m not talking grammar wise, yes, my grammar still sucks but when I can make someone feel better about a problem they are worried about or be a listening ear and offer some sound advice, I personally find that much more valuable. I thought of starting an advice series on my blog whereas anyone could ask me anything and I would try and offer some advice to them, the best I could. Kinda like those “Ask Debbie” columns in Women’s magazines. But better. Hopefully.
I won’t publish names of people who ask these questions, whether I know who it is personally or not and I am happy to try and answer a variety of topics from blogging, business, friendship or relationships. Obviously I will have more experience in some areas than others and some topics I won’t be able to help with at all because I’m just not qualified to give that sort of advice. And that’s okay. But I’ll do the best I can and be a friend to someone that needs advice and that’s fine with me.
Question: How do you manage friendships when you have no kids and your friends have just had babies? Two of my besties have just had children so should I suggest meeting up? What are the rules?
First of all, you’re my first ever question so congrats! And second of all, this is a great question. One that I’d also love to hear other people’s opinions on because I’m at the age where this is starting to become a “thing”, too.
There are no rules in friendship and every friendship is different but the biggest thing I would mention here is that you have to remember that your friends are going to be exceptionally busy now they’ve just had children. And it may be down to you for a while to initiate seeing each other. But that’s okay.
I’ve been in this situation in the past where my one of my old best friends had a baby and suddenly, it was so difficult to find time to spend with her. I’m not saying single girls or women without children aren’t just as busy, we are. But children are a whole different ball game which I couldn’t even comprehend right now. And if you’re the one without the child, you have to realise that your friend now has a whole new lot of responsibilities and priorities.
I would definitely suggest meeting up but ensure it’s well in advance and at a time and place that’s convenient for a mother with a new baby. For example, a girlie cinema date with a new born probably isn’t the best idea! Your friend will appreciate you thinking about them this way and then once you are together, it’ll be much more relaxing and less stressful for both parties if you’re in a safe and comfortable environment for a very small baby and probably a new, slightly stressed and under-slept mother.
Friendship is a two way street and if you both value your friendship then there’s no reason why it can’t continue as normal post baby. You’ll just have an extra person to give loads of cuddles to!
Do you have any extra advice for this question? Have you been on either side of this situation before? If so, and you’d like to share your own experiences and advice, do leave a comment!
Need some advice and want your question featured in my ‘Ask Jenny’ series? Drop me an email at: firstname.lastname@example.org! No names will be published in the blog post. Happy to accept questions from a variety of topics such as: blogging, business, friendship, relationships, mental health and more.