collaborative post | How many times have you heard people say they had to hit rock bottom before they could stop drinking? It is so common that the sentiment has become an accepted fact in the minds of some people. But is it really a fact, or is it just a myth? Can someone struggling with alcohol really only stop after hitting rock bottom?
Photo by Karol Chomka on Unsplash
Here is the truth: needing to hit rock bottom before you can stop drinking is a myth. There is no known psychological or medical requirement to reach such a low point before one can consciously commit to change.
We associate the rock-bottom mentality with the painful conditions that so often motivate change. Painful circumstances can indeed lead to life changes, but they are not prerequisites. Plenty of people make substantial life changes with very little pain, motivating them to do so.
Rock Bottom and the 12-Step Culture
So, if the rock-bottom principle is a myth, where did it come from? There are varying opinions. One of the more common rests in the 12-step culture. As you might already know, the 12-step culture was born with Alcoholics Anonymous back in the mid-1930s.
The culture promotes the idea of a person reaching a dramatic low point and realising it is a sign that they are ready for permanent change. It’s no coincidence that the first of the 12 steps is acknowledging that you have a problem with alcohol and that you are powerless to do something about it.
In fairness, the 12-step process developed by Alcoholics Anonymous has proven wildly successful. It has been adopted by countless support groups and national organisations as a way to help people through mutual support and accountability. And while 12-step programs do not work for everyone, they do work for many people. Yet that still doesn’t mean a person has to hit rock bottom before they can stop drinking.
It Has Its Downsides
On the one hand, the rock-bottom mindset can be uplifting to people who feel as though they have already hit that point in their lives. If they hear stories of others who have hit rock bottom and used it as motivation to change, they might feel like they can change as well. But the rock-bottom mindset also has its disadvantages.
One disadvantage is found in delay. Imagine a person struggling with alcohol being recommended to a home detox program. He laughs off the program and says he doesn’t need it now. He goes on to say that he will stop drinking when he eventually hits rock bottom.
For someone with a drinking problem, delaying abstinence only makes things worse. Problem drinking rarely resolves on its own. It takes a conscious choice and concerted effort to overcome. The longer a person waits, the harder overcoming gets.
Critics of the rock-bottom mentality also say that it reinforces shame and helplessness. They say heavy drinkers with that mindset often feel like they do not deserve help until their lives completely fall apart. Unfortunately, rock bottom for some people means irreversible health problems or even death.
Change Can Be Motivated by Other Things
Perhaps you know someone who quit alcohol after hitting rock bottom. Be grateful the choice to change was made. But do not assume you have to hit rock bottom as well. It is possible to be motivated by other things. Hitting rock bottom doesn’t have to be your only trigger for quitting alcohol.
People are sometimes motivated to quit alcohol when the costs of continued drinking outweigh any perceived rewards. A similar motivation rests in alternative rewards being more attractive than the rewards of drinking. Examples of alternative rewards include better relationships, more meaningful work, enjoyable hobbies, etc.
Still others are motivated to change out of concern for family. They see how drinking is affecting their spouses and children, how they are struggling with boundaries associated with nurturing and protecting families. And because they love their families, they have reason to change.
A More Helpful Way to Think of Change
If you are struggling to find motivation and are waiting to hit rock bottom before you quit alcohol, there is a more helpful way to think of change. Consider how drinking is negatively affecting your life. Look at all the ways that it really isn’t working for you. Maybe it’s disrupting your sleep, harming your health, or even making your job more difficult.
If it is not working for you, what will work? Change what you do and start working in that direction. Find what will work for you to help you create the life you want. Then start pursuing it. If what works for you doesn’t include alcohol, you now have a very good reason to stop drinking.
Whatever you do, don’t wait until you hit rock bottom. You don’t have to fall that far.
