collaborative post // When you’re with the right person, dating can be a lot of fun. Still, some relationships can be very hard at times, and you might not even know what’s going on to the extent that you consult a dating coach.
It’s a tricky business, I know. It’s hard to know when you’ve found the right person and even harder to know if you’re dating a narcissist. For once in our life, we’ve probably stumbled upon the question, “am I dating a narcissist?” It can be difficult to tell, but if you’re noticing any of the following symptoms, there’s a strong possibility your partner doesn’t care about you as much as you deserve.
Narcissists are master manipulators, and they can be very hard to spot. What follows is a list of six telltale signs that you may be dating a narcissist, along with advice on how to handle the situation.
Who Are the Narcissists?
Narcissists are often portrayed as vain, self-absorbed, and have an inflated sense of self-importance, but the reality is more complicated than that. A narcissistic personality disorder is a real mental health condition that can cause significant problems in a person’s life. Research also reveals that narcissistic personality disorder is the second most common type compared to other personality disorders in the DSM-V or Diagnostic And Statistical Manual-V.
People with narcissistic traits can be difficult to be around, but not all narcissists have a narcissistic personality disorder. Many people with narcissistic traits are perfectly well-adjusted.
If you think you might be in a narcissistic relationship, it’s important to seek professional help. A narcissistic partner can be extremely challenging to deal with, but with the right help, it is possible to have a healthy and fulfilling relationship.
6 Signs You’re Dating a Narcissist
Narcissists are very good at getting what they want; if you are unsure what to look for, it can be hard to spot them. Here are six clear narcissistic behaviors that you should know before entering a romantic relationship.
Love bombing is something that narcissists often do when they are just getting to know someone. This is a way for narcissists to show how much they want to spend time with the person. It is a form of manipulation. They will make you their top priority and show you lots of love.
Be careful because once a narcissist thinks they have you in their grip, your importance and love for you start to fade. You may be dating one if you notice that your partner isn’t the same person they were when you first met, and you’re always doing things to get that person back.
Narcissists find it very hard to care about other people. Your partner may show this by not paying attention to your needs or feelings and focusing on their own.
They’ll always put themselves first because they think they’re more important than everyone else and, in a word, very special. They can have bad relationships with other people if the narcissist doesn’t see them as unique and important in the same way.
If you always feel like you’re being manipulated, this is another sign you’re dating a narcissist. Gaslighting is a type of manipulation that narcissists often use. This includes acting in a way meant to trick you into thinking you made something up or that your feelings and account of what happened are crazy.
Like when they gaslight you, a partner who gives you the silent treatment is trying to control you. When someone doesn’t talk to you, you might think you did something wrong and need to fix it or take responsibility for it before they talk to you again. Narcissists don’t take responsibility for what they’ve done. They won’t apologize and often use defense mechanisms to put the blame back on you, criticize you, and make you feel worthless.
Induce Feelings of Inferiority
“I’m not good enough” is something dating coaches hear all the time, and it’s one of the signs he’s dating a narcissist. The goal of a narcissist is to feel loved by the people around them.
If you always feel like you’re not good enough in the relationship, like you can’t do anything right, or like you’re “walking on eggshells,” you may be dating a narcissist.
Always Seek Admiration
Narcissists always seek admiration. It’s one of the most conspicuous narcissistic traits. When you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, you may continually seek their approval, only to be regularly disappointed.
A narcissistic partner may be excessively critical of you, or they may withhold compliments and positive reinforcement. They may also belittle your accomplishments and take credit for your successes.
You might wonder what’s going on in a narcissist’s head that makes them act this way. Dealing with their insecurities is another sign you’re dating a narcissist. A narcissist’s actions are often caused by insecurity or very fragile self-esteem.
Because of this, narcissistic people are self-centered, selfish, and always seeking praise. This makes them use manipulation to avoid being blamed. They will only do things that help themselves, even if it hurts others.
Tips On How To Deal With Narcissistic People
Narcissism is a personality disorder marked by a heightened sense of self-importance and a deep inability to care about others. There are some things to remember when dealing with a narcissist.
- First, it’s important to be clear about what you want and need. Selfish people are often very good at taking advantage of others, so you must be assertive to meet your needs.
- Second, don’t waste your time trying to reason with a narcissist or change their behavior; they won’t listen to you or care about your perspective.
- Lastly, remember to take care of yourself first and foremost. Dealing with them can be emotionally draining, so schedule some time for activities that make you happy and take care of yourself.
If you’re dating someone and begin to feel like they just don’t quite measure up in your eyes, or if you find yourself constantly giving more than you receive, it might be time to do some digging.
While there is no one-size-fits-all answer for dealing with a narcissistic partner, being armed with the information about what to look out for can give you the power to make the best decisions.
Visit Evan Marc Katz’s website for further details and suggestions on handling the situation if you suspect that the person you’re dating is a narcissist.