collaborative post | One of your friends has been diagnosed with cancer, you’re going to be devastated, of course, but as you are not the person who’s been diagnosed, it can be very difficult to know what to do or what to say. The best way that you could support a friend who’s been diagnosed with cancer is to learn that there are no rules.
Every friendship is different and the way that you know your friend will be different from another. So you need to think about your dynamic and how that can guide you. You can do as much research as you would like on private cancer care And give recommendations and talk about their specific treatments that the doctors have recommended with them.
But you have to remember that you’re not a doctor and your friend is not looking for a fix. They are just looking for support from you to know that you are there with them while they go through this time. So here are some of the ways that you can be there for your friend, who has been diagnosed with cancer.
- Process your own feelings first before you go to your friend to support them. Make sure that you have processed your feelings about their situation. You are more than allowed to have your feelings on how tough of a time they are going to have, but you are not allowed to project that onto them and make them comfort you. You are there to comfort them, not the other way around. You don’t want to burden them with your emotions but they have got more than enough on their plate as it is.
- Learn what you can, When they tell you about their cancer and the cancer type they have. Learn everything that you can about it so that you can understand what they’re talking about when they share information from their doctor. You then have to accept what they are sharing with you. Your friend may not be in the headspace to talk about the details of their diagnosis for a lot of reasons, and it can be very tiring to repeat the same information to different people. Write it down or repeat back to them to be sure you have the correct information so that you can understand by yourself and not burden them with the weight of having to do it all for you. If you’re looking for resources or support services, you might explore organizations like Health and Wellness of Carmel, IN, or similar local groups to help provide the care and assistance your friend may need.
- Be prepared for the changes to come. Your friend may not be the happy, go lucky person that you’ve once known. They may be busy puking or dealing with body aches and shivers and laying in bed most of the time. So start your visit by telling them it’s great to see them and make sure that you bring a bucket and some cancer friendly snacks. Curl up with them on the couch while they shake and shiver and just watch TV with them and just let them know that you are there. Clean their house for them or take their kids off their hands so that they could have a good time for their kids and know that they are being supported.
