AD // Sex is a big part of most of our lives and with the introduction of shows like Sex Education on Netflix, more and more people are talking about sex and making it a more normal part of every day life. Yay! I’ve not been too vocal talking about sex or sex related topics on this blog for a few reasons (mostly out of fear of who might be reading) but I want to start changing that.
I’ve wrote a couple of pieces for other blogs, including this one about 5 Things You Can Do To Enhance Your Masturbation Time and I always really enjoy writing these pieces. I know sex content isn’t for everyone – and that’s okay – but for those of y’all that do want to talk about sex, then it’s nice to have you here!
Today I want to talk about some easy tips you can implement to improve your sex life. We all have personal sex lives, with ourselves and our partners. And it’s okay to admit that your sex life might not be 100% where you want it to be. Our libidos and sex lives change massively over our lifetimes, due to a variety of different things from hormones, stress, health problems and much more.
Sexual wellness is like any other area of wellness; such as physical, mental and emotional. It needs to be nurtured and worked on over time. It’s a constant work in progress and that’s what makes it exciting – in my opinion! So if you’re ready to change things up, even just a little bit, let’s look at these easy ways to improve your sex life.
Understand that penetrative sex isn’t the ONLY way to have sex
If you want to explore this topic further, I’d highly recommend checking out this video from Hannah Witton on What Is Sex? It was incredibly interesting to see people break down what they think of as sex and see that penetrative sex isn’t the only way to do it. As Maeve says in Sex Education, “you have 10 fingers and a tongue – use your imagination”.
Have fun with experimentation
Experimenting can be really daunting at first but nobody is asking you to do BDSM if you don’t want to. Experimenting could mean something as small as having sex in a different room to normal or wearing some new sexy lingerie that you don’t usually wear. Take it slow and do what feels right for you – you can always build up from there.
You might want to invest in some of the best male enhancement pills to get the ball rolling! Experimenting on your own with different sex toys is a great way to get more in tune with what you like for both men and women.
A penis sleeve might be an interesting and exciting new toy to try for those with a penis. They can be used solo or with a partner, depending on the design you choose and there are different styles, depending on the type of desire or stimulation you’re after. There are so many available, there’s bound to be a choice for everyone!
Learn what you like on your own – as well as with your partner
This is a really important point because knowing what we like in our own bodies is a great starting point for improving our sex lives with our partners. If you have a penis, you might want to experiment with a male masturbator and for people with vaginas and a clitoris, there are plenty of amazing vibrators and devices out there to play with too!
Communication is SO important
I think this is one of the most important points in this list because before you even DO anything, learning how to communicate what you like, don’t like and what your expectations are is really important and I think this is the point that has helped me the most. Talking about things with your partner can be a bit embarrassing at first but the more you do it, the easier and more natural it’ll feel.
Related read: How To Have More Effective Communication in Relationships
But consent is even more important
And finally, the most important point of all. Consent, consent, consent. However you choose to try and improve your sex life; whether that’s trying a different position or introducing toys into the bedroom, consent should always come first and if either party isn’t happy with it, then it stops and you communicate. Consensual sex is the best sex.
So let me hear your tips! What advice would you give to someone who wants to improve their sex life?
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I Like this topic and it is very informative and I liked it very much and I would like to suggest this with my friends.
Thanks for sharing. Good Sex is very important for good relationship.
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100% agree with this and so glad we are speaking up about sex in a positive way! As you said consent is a must and also discovering new things and way to pleasure yourself and partner, sex is not just penetrative but so much more! Thanks for sharing x
Thank you lovely!
So important! Thanks for sharing lovely
These are such great tips! I totally agree with all of the above. I’m working on a post about female sexuality – I honestly think every woman should own a vibrator. Being able to satisfy yourself without relying on a partner is an important part of learning what you like.
Oh yes I totally agree! I’ve been lucky enough to work with a few sex toy brands which are female empowerment focused and their products are INCREDIBLE!
Thank you for sharing this Jenny. I 100% agree with everything, communication especially goes a long way in how good sex can be. Also like Oloni says ‘consent is sexy’. 🥰
Wonderful post Jenny! Having these conversations are super helpful. We definitely need to normalize the topic of sex. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you, totally agree!
Being open about talking about sex is so important — especially understanding that intimacy can be found in a number of ways. I think consent needs to better explored within media and generally more robustly understood so I am so happy you mentioned it here. Thanks for sharing these tips!
I agree. It needs to start with school. I never EVER remember learning anything about consent at school – and I went to an all girls school!
Thanks for sharing Jenny! I’m so glad the subject of sex is being opened up in a positive way- and thank you for adding your thoughts x
Thank you I agree!
I worked in an adult store for years that focused on education. I was much younger then, but it was hands down the most rewarding job I’ve ever had. A friend of mine bought the store a year back and brought it into the 21st century a bit. Sexual health is SO important, and still considered taboo in so many ways…thank you for sharing! This is something everyone needs to hear at some point in their lives (often multiple times) and the conversations happen so much less frequently than they should.
That’s amazing! I agree, the more openly we talk about it, the less taboo it’ll be for future generations, I should hope!
It’s always so refreshing to see someone talk about sex because so many people still shy away from the topic. Communication is definitely the key to unlocking so much pleasure in your sex life. I always think it’s a good thing to learn what you actually like and explore your own body just as much as exploring your partners. 🙂
Thank you! I totally agree, how are they supposed to know what you like, if you don’t?
Great tips! Open communication is so important.
It sure is x
I’m really happy to see someone is talking about sex and making conversation on it. My biggest sex tip is to constantly communicate with your partner and educate yourself beforehand.
Thank you! Yes yes yes to both of those!
It’s good to see a blogger tackling this topic Jenny, this is a great read! x
Lucy | http://www.lucymary.co.uk
Thank you x
This is an important conversation to have!
We need to be more open about this subject, because it allows you to really connect with the person you love. As a mum I’ve experienced the impact of not nurturing that connection and its not good.
We should also educate young people on a very natural thing. I don’t know why people don’t want to talk about it.
Some good tips there, was nice to read about sex in a professional manner.
My tip with regards to womens vibrators would be dont shy away from them. The Companies are really discreet now with packaging if you are ordering something and using them can be really enjoyable x
I agree, educating at a younger age in a more matter of fact way could be so beneficial!
I think it is important to talk about sex and have healthy conversations especially for people who are younger and less confident. Thank you for sharing this post Jenny.
Lauren – http://www.bournemouthgirl.com
I totally agree! Thank you x
Love this. I love that you are so open about this topic. 🥰 thanks for sharing
Thank you x