As humans, we do tend to complicate things more than necessary don’t we? Picking a more difficult route to get from A to B. Over-thinking every situation – even more so if you’ve suffered with anxiety, like me. Adding more and more flavours to our food when simple salt and pepper would have sufficed. We’re even complicating self care these days. So let’s look at how to make self care uncomplicated.
So what is self care? The definition of self care from Wikipedia states: “Self-care has been defined as the process of taking care of oneself with behaviors that promote health and active management of illness when it occurs. Individuals engage in some form of self-care daily with food choices, exercise, sleep, and dental care.”
Obviously that definition only scratches the surface because as our knowledge and self awareness has grown, so has our understanding of self care and the different elements that can contribute towards an effective self care practice. We now know:
- Self care looks different for everyone, based on their needs
- There are different areas of self care, some of which may need more focus than others
- Self care can be seasonal and change during seasons of our own lives
- Self care doesn’t have to cost anything
But as I said at the start, us humans have a wonderful knack for over-complicating things that really don’t need to be complicated and I feel like self care has definitely become one of those things.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve definitely been guilty of complicating my own self care over the years, trying harder and harder to search for that “perfect” self care routine and those things that are going to transform me into a completely new woman.
Spoiler alert: it doesn’t work.
So in this post, let’s look at how to make self care uncomplicated as well as some things that you might be doing which is overcomplicating what should be a simple and pure practice.
Does what you’re doing feel like self care? If not, then you’re making it complicated
In 2020, I invested a LOT of time and energy into manifestation coaches. I bought their courses, listened to their podcasts daily, followed their blog posts and tried to replicate everything they suggested in the hope it would 1) help me manifest shit and 2) improve my daily self care and well-being.
But it didn’t feel like self care. It felt like a chore.
I was trying to stick to these long-winded morning routines which although might work for some, bored me to tears and made me agitated more than anything else. I realized that just because THEY considered it self care, didn’t mean that I would. I had unintentionally made my own self care incredibly complicated.
You don’t always have to make lists, notes, journal or keep track of your self care
Self care should come from intuition. Not from a to-do list.
I think it’s become more common, with the rise of things like bullet journals, to track EVERYTHING. Including self care. Which, has it’s place and can definitely help some people and is beneficial for certain things. I personally have started tracking my habits over the last few months, which has benefitted me trying to get out of a state of depression and low mood.
But self care that targets what your soul needs at any given time, I don’t personally believe can be tracked. Journaling is a great act of self care in and of itself. But will talking about what I’m going to do for self care help me? No. Actually doing it will.
Putting acts of self care on a to-do list is a great way to remind yourself that self care is important. But if you DON’T end up doing them or don’t feel like doing what you’ve written down, it’s going to push back your self care and make you feel worse
You might be doing more than what you need
I established a 10 step morning routine once because manifestation influencers told me to. It took too long. And it didn’t achieve anything other than me trying to rush through it because I was bored and wanted to get on with my day. This was NOT self care.
This was me, copying other people because they said it worked and it’s what you “should” do.
When it comes to how to make self care uncomplicated, there is NOTHING that you *should* do. And lumping everyone together in a box will not help. If you’re finding your self care isn’t working for you, you might simply be doing too much of it.
One of the easiest ways of how to make self care uncomplicated is to stop feeling like you need to “do it all”. Which I know is easier said than done.
Tune in to your inner voice or intuition
Self care comes from within or at least, the knowing of it does. Your inner voice and intuition knows what it needs to do to tend to your mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health. So stop talking over it and dismissing what it has to say and start tuning it and listening to it’s frequency.
I’ve had plenty of moments where I’ve taken a bath, thinking that that’s what I “needed” because it’s a commonly recommended act of self care. Only to get in the bath, be agitated and distracted and not wanting to be in there at all. That wasn’t what I needed.
But perhaps had I actually tuned in and listened, I would have realized that I actually needed to go for a walk or journal or spend some time alone.
Turn to nature for inspiration on how to make self care uncomplicated
Nature is a beautiful teacher. I’ve started leaning on nature and the seasons for how I’m going to spend certain months of the year. December 2021 was a good example, as I continually reminded myself of the word “comfort”. It’s cold, it’s Winter and in those months we require comfort. So that’s what I gave myself.
Seeing the seasons change so effortlessly can be a wonderful boost of inspiration for you to finally stop complicating your life and your self care practices and start seeing your seasons for what they are.
Nature is so simple and so beautiful. It does what it needs to do, all the time. Every day. It’s the most beautifully uncomplicated thing in the world. You might want to simply spend more time in nature, take up a gardening, learn about the moon phases or something else to let nature help you make your self care uncomplicated.
It’s so easy to get caught up in wanting to do *ALL THE THINGS* to help your self care practices that we forget that sometimes it’s not about adding things into your routine, it’s about taking them away.
It doesn’t matter how generic your self care practice is – whether that’s the age old light and candle and have a bath or go for a walk – if it helps you in that moment and gives you what you need, then that’s all that matters.
[…] is the phrase you’d have heard everyone and their Nan talk about. Self-care can refer to physical, emotional, mental, sexual or spiritual acts that can can help you build up […]
Great post! Self care is individualised
It sure is x
Love this idea that self care really is different for everyone! And I think it’s also important that it’s okay if you’re self care changes especially depending on seasons.
Yes absolutely! I think that it’s important it does change with the seasons if you need it too!
Your soul knows what it needs. You just have to tune into it.
[…] How To Make Self-Care Uncomplicated […]
I never realised how important self care was until I actually did it. My friends had to force me out of my funk and I actually glad they did because now I try and do this on a regular basis!
I’m glad they forced you too!
[…] post // Something that can really make a profoundly positive difference to your life is simply having a fuller and better control of your energy levels. This means being able to summon […]
I love the bit about rejuvenation and watching the seasons change. That hints at being in the moment. For me, that can be really hard, but it is so necessary for taking care of me. As always, great post! xx
It can definitely be really hard especially when everything is so busy and on the go!
I love this, Jenny! Self-care has been such a big trend in recent years that it can sometimes feel like we’re constantly being pushed a bunch of products and a very “insta-worthy” idea of what it is. If that works for some people, amazing – but my ADHD brain simply cannot do a 10-step routine and consider that relaxing!
For sure!! I think wellness in general has morphed into something that should look good from the outside without much indication of how it actually feels on the inside!
I really love this – sometimes when I am overwhelmed I know I should practice self care but my brain isn’t motivated. This is going to help shift the focus and I hope it will improve my selfcare consistency!
Rose | Beauty & Lifestyle Blogger
@rosemaryhelenxo | https://rosemaryhelenxo.com
Hope these help! 🙂
I really like how you pointed out that self-care should be intuitive and based around what works individually. For some people lists and journaling is effective, and for others it feels like a chore. Everyone is different so what works as self-care will be different from person to person, too. Thanks for sharing!
xoxo,
Sydney
http://www.thelotuslist.com
Absolutely! Lists definitely have their place – I couldn’t function without one! When it comes to self care though you’ve gotta be careful with lists x
I am a big over thinker, so I definitely make things more complicated than they need to be. These are some really good tips to help with self care. I have definitely been more spontaneous with my self care rather than ensuring I have a habit tracker. Thank you for sharing.
Lauren.
Thanks Lauren. I think habit trackers are great and definitely have their place! But sometimes, you just need to do what your soul knows it needs!
For us, self-care is about deciding what we need in the moment. For example, after a long day at work, sometimes we want to be more social to destress, while other times we want to take a bath/watch a movie.
Yes absolutely, and that can change daily and that’s fine too!
I’ve honestly never even thought of it that way, but that’s such a great point – if it feels like a chore, it’s not really self-care. Thanks for this!
Yep absolutely!
I definitely agree that self-care should come from intuition not from a to-do list. I never keep track of my self-care routine, well just tv show schedule lol~ For me, self-care has to be done when I need it, like I’m going to exfoliate my skin or make an appointment for a facial on weekends because I can’t do it on weekdays. Self-care shouldn’t be complicated and expensive, and I love the feeling I got from that 😀
I totally agree, I need to do my self care activities when I feel like I need them too 🙂
Love this post! It’s all about finding your own definition of self care and doing things, in the moment, that will help you.
Yes absolutely 🙂
You’re right, self-care should not be complicated and expensive, it’s important not to do all your self-care practices at once either. I like how you mentioned not needing to make lists to make sure you achieve your self-care. Self-care should be done as and when you need it, you shouldn’t need to find space for it in your schedule! x
Lucy | http://www.lucymary.co.uk
Yes totally agree! Lists can be helpful but just working your self care from a list turns it into a job or a chore x
I love this post. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you 🙂
I love this post so much! I completely agree that self-care depends on the person – there’s no one set thing which will work for everyone, it has to come for you. I love being in nature and just taking some time for myself! Thank you so much for sharing x
Yes absolutely, copying someone else’s version of self care will never work!
I agree with listening to yourself and your body, it tells you when you need to slow down. I used to ignore it and get really ill but now I try and listen to it and it has helped my mentally so much.
That’s great to hear! I’m getting much better at it too 🙂
I try to remember I can’t do ALL the things I enjoy. I try to get some activity every day and one pleasurable thing. Like tv, reading etc
That’s a good idea, you can’t do everything all the time!
I love the idea of making self-care simple; it has to be something we can maintain and access with ease (so that it doesn’t become something else to stress about). This is a great reminder that I’m going to use to rethink how I approach this for myself. Thanks for sharing!
Yes exactly! We make it too complicated then it’s absolutely just something else to worry and stress about x
I love this post, Jenny! I think sometimes we see all these articles about self-care, but they are so complicated or daunting, so we don’t actually start. This post can help us realise that self-care is anything and everything that helps you feel good- it doesn’t have to be a long routine or something complicated. Thank you for the reminder, I am trying to do my tasks more mindfully to avoid burning out again 🙂
Absolutely agree! Like me with my 10 step bloody morning routine 😂
We all do it! The key to success is simplicity with these things x
Absolutely agree with all of this. Self care shouldn’t be complicated, nor should it feel like a chore. The ten step morning routine sounds wild to me. It sounds so unnecessarily lengthy. I can imagine it’s quite disheartening if you don’t manage to get a step done. This was such a lovely read, I found myself nodding along with so many points.
Claire.X
http://www.clairemac.co.uk
It was such a chore but it just shows what influence people have online to make you think you need to do that!
I love how you have pointed out how self-care looks different for everyone. It certainly isn’t a one size fits all approach. Great post
Definitely not 🙂 thank you x
Yeah! Self-care should not be complicated and expensive. Everyone has different needs. You just need to prioritise your needs. Thank you for sharing. Good post!
Absolutely 🙂 thank you x
Great post, I think we’re all a bit guilty in thinking we’ve to do things in a certain way because influencers tell us to. I took up gardening this year, I love the peace and satisfaction I get from it
Yes I think so too haha! Oooh that sounds lovely x