AD // Sex is a big part of most of our lives and with the introduction of shows like Sex Education on Netflix, more and more people are talking about sex and making it a more normal part of every day life. Yay! I’ve not been too vocal talking about sex or sex related topics on this blog for a few reasons (mostly out of fear of who might be reading) but I want to start changing that.

I’ve wrote a couple of pieces for other blogs, including this one about 5 Things You Can Do To Enhance Your Masturbation Time and I always really enjoy writing these pieces. I know sex content isn’t for everyone – and that’s okay – but for those of y’all that do want to talk about sex, then it’s nice to have you here!

Today I want to talk about some easy tips you can implement to improve your sex life. We all have personal sex lives, with ourselves and our partners. And it’s okay to admit that your sex life might not be 100% where you want it to be. Our libidos and sex lives change massively over our lifetimes, due to a variety of different things from hormones, stress, health problems and much more.

Sexual wellness is like any other area of wellness; such as physical, mental and emotional. It needs to be nurtured and worked on over time. It’s a constant work in progress and that’s what makes it exciting – in my opinion! So if you’re ready to change things up, even just a little bit, let’s look at these easy ways to improve your sex life.

Understand that penetrative sex isn’t the ONLY way to have sex

If you want to explore this topic further, I’d highly recommend checking out this video from Hannah Witton on What Is Sex? It was incredibly interesting to see people break down what they think of as sex and see that penetrative sex isn’t the only way to do it. As Maeve says in Sex Education, “you have 10 fingers and a tongue – use your imagination”. 

Have fun with experimentation 

Experimenting can be really daunting at first but nobody is asking you to do BDSM if you don’t want to. Experimenting could mean something as small as having sex in a different room to normal or wearing some new sexy lingerie that you don’t usually wear. Take it slow and do what feels right for you – you can always build up from there.

Learn what you like on your own – as well as with your partner

This is a really important point because knowing what we like in our own bodies is a great starting point for improving our sex lives with our partners. If you have a penis, you might want to experiment with a male masturbator and for people with vaginas and a clitoris, there are plenty of amazing vibrators and devices out there to play with too!

Communication is SO important 

I think this is one of the most important points in this list because before you even DO anything, learning how to communicate what you like, don’t like and what your expectations are is really important and I think this is the point that has helped me the most. Talking about things with your partner can be a bit embarrassing at first but the more you do it, the easier and more natural it’ll feel.

Related read: How To Have More Effective Communication in Relationships 

But consent is even more important 

And finally, the most important point of all. Consent, consent, consent. However you choose to try and improve your sex life; whether that’s trying a different position or introducing toys into the bedroom, consent should always come first and if either party isn’t happy with it, then it stops and you communicate. Consensual sex is the best sex.

So let me hear your tips! What advice would you give to someone who wants to improve their sex life?

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32 Comments

  1. 100% agree with this and so glad we are speaking up about sex in a positive way! As you said consent is a must and also discovering new things and way to pleasure yourself and partner, sex is not just penetrative but so much more! Thanks for sharing x

  2. These are such great tips! I totally agree with all of the above. I’m working on a post about female sexuality – I honestly think every woman should own a vibrator. Being able to satisfy yourself without relying on a partner is an important part of learning what you like.

  3. Being open about talking about sex is so important — especially understanding that intimacy can be found in a number of ways. I think consent needs to better explored within media and generally more robustly understood so I am so happy you mentioned it here. Thanks for sharing these tips!

  4. I worked in an adult store for years that focused on education. I was much younger then, but it was hands down the most rewarding job I’ve ever had. A friend of mine bought the store a year back and brought it into the 21st century a bit. Sexual health is SO important, and still considered taboo in so many ways…thank you for sharing! This is something everyone needs to hear at some point in their lives (often multiple times) and the conversations happen so much less frequently than they should.

  5. It’s always so refreshing to see someone talk about sex because so many people still shy away from the topic. Communication is definitely the key to unlocking so much pleasure in your sex life. I always think it’s a good thing to learn what you actually like and explore your own body just as much as exploring your partners. 🙂

  6. I’m really happy to see someone is talking about sex and making conversation on it. My biggest sex tip is to constantly communicate with your partner and educate yourself beforehand.

  7. This is an important conversation to have!

    We need to be more open about this subject, because it allows you to really connect with the person you love. As a mum I’ve experienced the impact of not nurturing that connection and its not good.

    We should also educate young people on a very natural thing. I don’t know why people don’t want to talk about it.

    1. Some good tips there, was nice to read about sex in a professional manner.

      My tip with regards to womens vibrators would be dont shy away from them. The Companies are really discreet now with packaging if you are ordering something and using them can be really enjoyable x

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