#AD It’s absolutely no secret by now that I’ve suffered with Generalised Anxiety Disorder for a good 6 or so years. I’ve spoke about it on my blog multiple times (I have a whole Mental Health section here, with plenty of personal anxiety related posts as well as tips and tricks for anyone else that might be suffering) and I always mention it on Twitter. I’m very open and honest about my journey, experience, goals and ambitions and most things I do, I take anxiety into consideration.
I’ve had therapy in the past and from that, I’ve learnt to accept that my GAD may always be a part of me. However, I’m learning more and more each day how to live with it and manage it, instead of fight it. Anxiety has taken a lot from me and limited my life in so many ways but gradually, I’m taking the control back.
I never want my anxiety to limit my life. I want to be able to experience things I want to experience without having anxiety pulling me back by the collar saying, “no, I don’t think so!” It might be a little harder for me than some other people but with support, love, self belief and coping mechanisms, I know I can do anything I set my mind to.
So today I wanted to write a little ‘Anti-Anxiety’ Bucket List. I’m not usually a huge fan of bucket lists and I’m not intending this to be a list that I’m going to actively tick off but more of a way of saying ‘f you’ to anxiety and making a note of some things (big and small) that I’d love to do in my life that I won’t let anxiety stop me doing.
If I don’t end up ticking these things off? So what. Circumstances change. But the idea isn’t that it’s all or nothing, it’s knowing that if it came to it, anxiety would’t stop me living my best life.
Moving out and having my own place
I’m not ashamed to still be living with my parents in my 20’s but I’d love to have my own place at some point in my life. I’d love to decorate it how I like, be the host for Christmas and of course have my own little office space for blogging. Moving out seems pretty daunting (probably for everyone, not just someone with anxiety) but it’s something I’d love to do.
Having a baby
Phew, that’s a big one isn’t it? I’m 26 and have no plans to have a baby any time soon. I’ve been with my boyfriend for around 4 years and we’ve discussed baby names that we like but that’s about as far as that conversation has gone. The thought of being pregnant and giving birth makes me break out in a sweat. And my anxiety makes my pregnancy fears even worse. But one day, I’d love to have a little family (preferably 2 boys!)
Do a driving experience at a race track
I love Motorsport (I wrote about a visit to Donington Formula 1 Museum here and my recent stay at the Brooklands Hotel here), I love watching the cars fly around a track and I’m in constant awe of these incredible pieces of machinery and the speeds they can get up to. I’m relatively close to both Brands Hatch and Silverstone and I’d love to do a driving experience around one of these tracks one day.
This one seems completely unrealistic to me right now but I’ve always loved the idea of going on holiday alone and I still stand by that now. It’s something I’d love to do in my life and I know it would be a huge challenge for my anxiety. I don’t even necessarily mean anywhere far and exotic, I’d just like the experience of being alone and navigating a different environment without the help and support of someone else.
Do something within the film / television industry
A pipe dream of mine has always been to be a voice for a character in an animation. I think that’d be so much fun and an amazing experience seeing your animation with your voice come to life. I’m not sure how I’d ever get into doing that but this is a bucket list, so anything goes. I’m a huge TV series fan as well, so being an extra on a show would be incredible.
I’d love to hear what you’d put on your own anti-anxiety bucket list (or just your regular bucket list if you don’t suffer from anxiety!) Share the wildest and biggest dreams and goals you have!
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